WIVES
I was at a wedding this monsoon, mouth full of delicious food and ears stuffed with brass band litany โ an Indian staple when I received a text message from Hawakal about a literary project they wished to discuss with me. I sneaked out, dialled them with a hand over my uncommitted ear, and as the bride and groom took their oaths โ younger cousins upholding tradition by hitting on prospective partners โ the editor at Hawakal explained to me their idea of a poetry anthology meant for wives, by husbands.

Open to husbands โ married, divorced, separated, estranged, and widowed โ the anthology, while acknowledging and respecting all possible gender identities and husband-wife roles, seeks to present a selection of poetry penned by poets identifying as males, for female wives โ theirs and othersโ. Our consideration does not disrupt, negate, or disrespect the relationships where a woman can be a husband to another woman, a man can be a wife to another man and other gender roles where traditional gender constructs are challenged.
One of our goals with this project was to make it diverse, both in form and content. I was elated to receive poems of many forms and genres โ rhymed verse, free verse, prose poems, visual poems, sonnets, elegies, odes, satires, haiku, sequence poems, villanelles, and some that defy categorisation. Theme-wise, too, there is remarkable variety, notwithstanding the underlying theme that binds them all. In these poems, the reader lives the entire spectrum and many possibilities of marriage โ sweet beginnings, bittersweet bickerings, everyday bliss, weary years, proud memories, tragic losses, doomed ends, and happily ever afters.
There is humour and play in Bob Kingโs depiction of conjugal life: โBridget keeps confusing the words anecdote & antidote, which would be more maddening if I was bitten by a rattlesnake & hopping around on one footโ (โLessons in Adaptabilityโ).
In John Greyโs verse, we see husbands complemented and completed by wives: โMy wife sips a martini, / doesnโt even notice the turbulence. / … I grip the armrests of my seat, / struggle to hold the plane together. / Any calmer and sheโd be mistaken for / a Zen master meditatingโ (โThe Calm One in a Rough Landingโ).
In โHummm,โ D.C. Nobes captures the primordial vibration of companionship: โA chord of punctuation / in our swaying conversational hum / over the blend of mango and banana / strawberry and orange / with a hint of mint on the side. / I say โHmmm!โโ
Nathanael OโReilly offers comfort in metaphors: โYouโre corduroy to my thighs. / Youโre an afternoon nap and Iโm jetlagโ (โEpithalamiumโ).
Paul Hostovskyโs voice is the collective experience of many poet-husbands, as the wife in his poem commands: โIf you write me another love poem, jeez, / keep me out of it, will you please? / … And itโll be very good if I can read it / without a dictionaryโ (โInstructions for His Next Love Poemโ).
Kiriti Sengupta treads the line between faith and superstition in his depiction of the boy-girl divide in Indian society:
Prior to her labor,
my mother-in-law keenly observed
my wifeโs navel,ย Come on, itโs a boy!
…
My son is at school.
Itโs a co-education convent.
After school, he tells his mother,
Girls sit on the left side.ย (โY-Geneโ)
And then in Senguptaโs portrayal of the male lifespan as a female liability: โShe guards two pairs of bangles: / coral and conch. / Missus ensures they are intact. / She fears a chink will curtail my breathโ (โTrothโ).
Reliance on the better half is a recurring trope in the anthology. The husband in David Mihalyovโs poem depends on his spouse for his very memory: โHe joins his daughters on the couch and scans / photo albums. Certain pictures elicit / events, but the printed versions / donโt match the cavities in his mindโ (โHer Job is Not to be His Memoryโ).
In playful contrast to female liability, GJV Prasad bares the male burden in marriage: โmy wife you wait / for my first faux pas of the day / being male and a husband / for me there is no escapeโ (โsaturday morning ritualโ). And he goes on to talk of promises kept: โI used to sing a Beatles song / About ageing together / Will you still need me / You reminded me / Singing / Now I am sixty-four / Still best friendsโ (โWifeโ).
Formidable opponents populate Karan Kapoorโs verse that marries the domestic to the celestial:
Ma / kneads
dough / breaks her
nail / blames him
…
My father always stands
against the sky / even god
fails to compel his eye (โRings of Saturnโ)
While Steve Denehan gladly accedes to being the third wheel in his cosy alliance: โmy wife smiles at my daughter / my daughter smiles back / I disappear for a moment / view it all as a ghost / as a person there but not thereโ (โBarcelona, October 2018โ).
Amit Majmudar first teaches love and falling out in โPoem without a Titleโ: โA love with no fights is a pond with no tadpoles, / a poem with no rhymes, a church with no bibles. / … A love with no fights is a patient with no vitalsโ; and then in โDenialโ: โThe life left after a marriage is the silence left after the music.โ
Roomy Naqvyโs verse, beginning in the safety of childhood, takes a grim turn: โAs an infant, you loved soft toys, / Cuddly and silk-textured. / … Soft toys are nice and cuddly, / They are nice to hold, / They can kill you nicelyโ (โSoft Toysโ).
Uday Shankar Ojha releases the skeleton in traditionโs closet: โHer glass eyes weaving mystery / piled dreams scarcely heard. / She wandered silently, running swift / and sudden when summonedโ (โWe Loved Not Each Otherโ). Then he goes on to narrate the turning of the tide: โShe hisses and hushes / his words in the glottis. / Subversion of history lingers. / โฆ She stamps defiant; / he slides softlyโ (โThe Way the Wind Blowsโ).
We see a marriage marred by the banality of time in Richard-Yves Sitoskiโs โProgressโ: โSinks remain full, the meals / we cook have fewer components. / … Our habits / are cardigans, see-through / at the elbows yet too tight to allow / the spreading of arms.โ
And Sudeep Senโs lament, a diptych spanning decades, bleeds poetic injustice:
We are sealed in marriage today
ย to celebrate
tomorrow โ the earthโs longest day. (โDay Before Summer Solsticeโ)
Now, you carefully choose this day
ย to burn down that sacrament โ
stardust to ash, ash to deathly black. (โDecree Nisiโ)
These and more wonders dwell in these hundred or so pages, offering a fine selection from forty-seven poets (forty-eight, when I include mine) belonging to twelve countries. Iโm blessed to have the support of these outstanding poets worldwide, just as I am grateful to Hawakal for trusting me with this project. I earnestly hope Wives reaches far and wide and serves its intended purpose of bringing joy and hope to those reading it.
Ankit Raj Ojha
15 October 2023
Karnal, Haryana
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Simple and sincere and a good choice of poems. Well done!
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pleasure though in virtual reality. Best wishes. Wribhu Chattopadhyay
Simple and lovely! It’s great to see the books. I look forward to seeing my copy in the mail soon!
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I understand quite well and share Sudeep Sen’s profound desire to reveal himself. If the writer, any writer, cannot reveal…